tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-60012934861781333452024-03-12T18:06:36.093-04:00Seeking the Gifts of FibromyalgiaAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14693765402080386585noreply@blogger.comBlogger128125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6001293486178133345.post-12081161647604478422016-02-18T14:11:00.000-05:002016-02-18T15:55:33.028-05:00My Triplets Turned 16 and I Fell ApartI had no idea I would become an emotional wreck when my triplets turned 16 years old. I leaned into to the day with pride, joy and excitement. We celebrated with sheer abandon. The next day I was flooded with memories and the tears began to flow.<br />
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I had to make some really difficult decisions from very early on. When my three were just 4 months old, I became a single parent with no child support. My degree is in Early Childhood Education and when I became pregnant, I was the Director of a great child care center. I was laid off during my maternity leave. <br />
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Before starting a family I made the appropriate plans, as all good americans are taught to do. I had a solid degree, a solid job, owned a home and was ready to start a family...one child at a time. After 2 years of fertility issues and the heart-wrenching ups and downs of this cycle, it was decided that I would be just slightly more aggressive with the treatments. The first month with the new treatment, I became pregnant with three. My reaction to the news was pure bliss! I had no doubts that there was a plan in place and all I needed to do is allow and receive. Plus, my education would surely be a great asset with a 'group' of children to raise.<br />
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Given my petite size, the doctors approached me about selective reduction. They told me that all three babies may not make it and/or I may not make it through the birth. It was made clear that the smallest fetus would be the best choice. I didn't hesitate to tell the doctor that I did not choose to become pregnant with three lives and I will not choose to change that fact. I felt strongly that I was given a gift...three gifts and it was my responsibility to do all that I could to carry out the pregnancy for all of the gifts I was given. I wasn't scared. I was hopeful and open to the task that was handed to me. I know who the smallest fetus was at the time and can not imagine the huge mistake it would have been to terminate that life. I am so grateful I refused to make that decision!<br />
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No job, no child support and living 2 hours away from where I had built a life, I still had hope. Although I didn't have the means to buy them many things or pay for a home of our own, I supported them as individuals, I kept them safe, taught them right from wrong and guided them to explore each of their worlds. My focus has been to encourage these wonderful people to become the best of who they are meant to be.<br />
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For 12 years I was a single parent and money was scarce, but hope was abundant! My kids were happy, healthy and exploring what life had to offer. <br />
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Our lives have changed significantly since they were 12. I met an amazing man who was open to creating an instant family and we got married. We now own investment property and I have a thriving real estate career.<br />
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Two days ago my triplets turned 16 years old. On that day, I was saying, "I kept them alive for 16 years. I don't even have a plant that has been alive more than 4 years." I realized the reason I was saying that was because of the magnitude of responsibility I took on. During those trying years, I shrugged off the comments of, "Triplets! Oh my gosh. How do you do it?" or "I have one! I have no idea how you keep it together with three...born at the same time!" I would not allow myself to be open to the concept of it being hard. If I had, I wouldn't have been able to do what I did. The doubts and stress would have eaten me up. <br />
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I realize now, that part of my calling was to raise these three souls. They are not mine, I was just given the amazing opportunity to guide them and keep them safe until they could stand on their own. We have a few more years before they are fully able to be independent, if they choose and I'm sure they will all fly. They are my miracles!<br />
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Happy Birthday to my three blessings, Zyon, Hannah and Jordan. I would do it all over again if you needed me to. xoxoxoxo<br />
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Thank you for reading, forwarding and following!<br />
<br />
Terri<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14693765402080386585noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6001293486178133345.post-66952045766554999822016-01-20T18:54:00.000-05:002016-01-20T18:54:11.128-05:00Has It Really Been almost 2 Years?I just can't believe how time has flown by! It's incredible to me that I haven't written a blog post in almost 2 years. I'm sure you're wondering where I've been...especially because, when I started this blog, I was posting every day.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4LjwjhTx4XEYyzXwnyqhN2pYTUhFXMkJh1qGqxAVe_wtVZy-4URk2McgHBMKi0P5jTm8kj3OOi9sSPin9YrXXys6ZhVxvIFyK4eP3HqPzCGJunT4amBdEZp_hmu_Um0ipPZ4wh4pFy1g/s1600/balloon.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4LjwjhTx4XEYyzXwnyqhN2pYTUhFXMkJh1qGqxAVe_wtVZy-4URk2McgHBMKi0P5jTm8kj3OOi9sSPin9YrXXys6ZhVxvIFyK4eP3HqPzCGJunT4amBdEZp_hmu_Um0ipPZ4wh4pFy1g/s1600/balloon.jpeg" /></a>Let me tell you...My life has taken a turn! A massive turn for the good...for the amazing. About 3 years ago I decided that I wasn't going to work with traditional doctors anymore. I was tired of trying a new prescription medication and landing in the ER. This happened about 6 times in 8 months. I learned, not so very quickly, that my body can not handle prescription medications. I turned to Naturopathic Medicine. Once my body began to clear of toxins and my organs began to function, regularly again, I began to heal.<br />
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Just to go back a bit. I sought out healthy alternatives, often, to try to find what was best for my body to heal. There are just so many options out there, it would have taken me a lifetime to whittle down what worked for my body. I was in bed 18 to 20 hours a day with pain, fatigue and brain fog. I was losing the use of my legs once or twice a week. It is humbling to have to have a family member walk me to the bathroom when I my legs were too weak to hold me up. Taking a shower used up all the energy I had for the day. I pushed myself to exercise a couple of times a week because of the adrenal rush (fake sense of energy) and because doctors said it would help. My digestion completely shut down....annndddd...I won't go into detail about that whole 6 month episode. Long story short, traditional medicine doctors said all they could do is surgery and give me a colostomy bag. That was the last straw with traditional medicine. I suffered, my family suffered and friendships suffered. I was unable to work and landed on disability.<br />
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As someone who is a diehard entrepreneur, disability didn't sit well with me. I just didn't have a choice because sitting, or being in bed was pretty much all I could do. I would call that rock bottom. I stopped fighting my way through this illness and began to listen to my body, listen to my Naturopath and be committed to a non-toxic lifestyle.<br />
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What exactly is a non-toxic lifestyle? It is eating all organic, grass-fed and farm raised foods. For me, it is also, no dairy and no processed foods. In the beginning, I was boiling up a soup I call, salad soup. Due to my digestive challenges, I am unable to digest raw vegetables so I cut up organic vegetables and added them to some grass-fed chicken broth and boiled it to death. A non-toxic lifestyle is also eliminating any health care products that have chemicals in them. Toothpaste, face cream, moisturizer, deodorant and make-up are some of the products I replaced with non-toxic options. <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhTu64B0dk6xwZPVFFCaCzaAUscAHThzs-axeqqQWg_xogxgdx14Qxdq6PVpI2YRJWHbcnOWsiD3IamBDvkAv-2qqCsp9vAXi-JQDhdYN1CT_3WkP_AFMvlcTRiot0g6dqZ3snXv20bNQ/s1600/dream.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhTu64B0dk6xwZPVFFCaCzaAUscAHThzs-axeqqQWg_xogxgdx14Qxdq6PVpI2YRJWHbcnOWsiD3IamBDvkAv-2qqCsp9vAXi-JQDhdYN1CT_3WkP_AFMvlcTRiot0g6dqZ3snXv20bNQ/s1600/dream.jpeg" /></a>As long as I am focused and determined to keep the toxins out of my life, I feel great! It has it's challenges...like the holidays and my sugar addiction. They don't go well together. After I 'cheat' I find myself sliding down the slippery slope of fibro flare. Gladly, I know what sends me down that slope and what brings me back!<br />
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I can happily announce that I was once living with a pain level of 7-8 out of 10 on a daily basis and for the last year, I have been living with a pain level of 0-3 consistently. The fatigue that kept me in bed for 18-20 hours a day has diminished. I am up and about at 6am and to bed by 10pm. I've even started working again. A full-time Realtor! This is my dream job and I found my way too it...through the muck, but found it anyway!!<br />
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I hope that my story can help others find their way to their dreams! What are your dreams and how can I help you make your way to them?<br />
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Thank you for reading, forwarding and following!<br />
Terri<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14693765402080386585noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6001293486178133345.post-28188272153847803552014-07-28T17:55:00.001-04:002014-07-28T17:55:50.793-04:00The Bravest of HeartsTHE BRAVEST OF HEARTS<br />
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Your light shines bright every moment of everyday<br />
I see that you don't always feel it<br />
Know that those around you are touched, inspired and warmed by it<br />
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Go into the quiet, see the light that others see<br />
Allow yourself to be touched, inspired and warmed by that light<br />
Follow the bliss that permeates your cloak of humanness<br />
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See beyond the earthly circumstances to the unlimited potential you possess<br />
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The weight of the times drags you down<br />
You continue to take steps; big and small<br />
With a faith that carries all<br />
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Your shoulders show the heaviness that you carry<br />
Your eyes show the sparkling of love<br />
Your feet show the persistence of never ending hope<br />
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From stand still to trudge<br />
Trudge to stomp<br />
Stomp to march<br />
March to skip<br />
Skip to dance<br />
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Always making your way to Dance!<br />
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Thank you for being The Bravest of Hearts<br />
XOXOXOXOXO<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14693765402080386585noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6001293486178133345.post-22428811465262123382014-05-21T14:01:00.002-04:002014-05-21T14:01:47.378-04:00What is Your Chronic Mindset?What do many of us with chronic illness think about most of the time? We think about whatever is chronic and getting in the way of living our lives to the fullest. For me, it's my pain and fuzzy brain. For some it may be cancer or mental illness. When we think about the chronic illness part of our lives, it is very difficult to think past just that…illness.<br />
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No matter what illness we talk about, just the word 'chronic' insinuates something is wrong, there is a lack of something and we have limitations. I want to help you change your mindset from the chronic thoughts of chronic illness to the chronic thoughts of chronic wellness. Yes! This is possible when living with chronic something.<br />
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Let's take the word, chronic and examine it for just a second. Dictinary.com offers four similar definitions of this adjective. The one most of us think of when using the word is, "having long had a disease, habit, weakness or the like." I'm assuming that the habit that is mentioned must be a bad habit, although that is not clear. And thank goodness it's not clear, because it leaves the window open for a new thought. This new way of thinking about something being chronic could be my chronic meditation every morning. Two of the other definitions that are given are completely in line with this alternate way of thinking about what chronic is. The first says, "constant; habitual; inveterate." and the second is written, "continuing a long time or recurring frequently." I have meditated for many years and it occurs frequently. Best of all, meditation is good for me, I enjoy doing it and it doesn't hurt.<br />
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What is your chronic mindset? No, really. I want you to acknowledge it. Good. Does that line of thinking empower you or shrink you? Does that thinking allow you to fully express yourself joyfully? If your answers were, 'no' then it is time to find a new mindset. Find something, one thing that you do that lifts your spirits. Do you read uplifting or humorous books, write, help out in any large or small way? We each have gifts and talents that are meant to be shared and if yours are shadowed by pain or illness, we all lose out. Know that chronic illness is challenging and good things can come from it. Start by allowing your body to experience what it is experiencing. While you allow this, create some joy and watch it grow.<br />
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Changing our mindset and focusing on positive, uplifting assets we possess opens doors for a more joyful life.<br />
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Thank you for reading, forwarding and following,<br />
Terri<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14693765402080386585noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6001293486178133345.post-91831976160251747852014-04-15T21:41:00.000-04:002014-04-15T21:41:35.925-04:00Spring into Action…GentlyAhh….Springtime. The time when the early morning sun wakes us from our slumber, beautiful birds singing outside our window, nature begins waking with it's colors and life and we all emerge from the hibernation of Winter. According to the commercials on TV and the ads in magazines, we should be skipping down the street in a flowy yellow dress with some theme song in the background. "It's a new Day, la, la, la." <br />
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Well, not all of us enjoy the sun peering through the window in the morning. Especially if we just fell asleep after hours of staring at the ceiling. The birds need a mute button because during a fibro flare, everything sounds like it's channeled through a megaphone. Don't get me wrong, I love seeing the tulips emerging from the dirt and the grass regaining it's green color once again. Although, when I see this, I wonder where the spring is in my step. The song in my head goes something like, "Just get through the day with the least amount of pain, bahm, bahm, bahm…"<br />
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Of course there's no medical data showing that as the seasons change, flares become more frequent, but just ask someone with fibromyalgia. It's like saying that there's no proof that bad weather triggers arthritis pain. Just because it's not proven in a lab, doesn't mean it doesn't exist.<br />
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These days, I'm all about recognizing that weather patterns can change my circumstances then adjusting accordingly. My pain actually gets worse if I begin to get angry or stressed about the changed experience. So, I do my best to forgive my body for the pain and do more to nurture my achy back or pained hips. I think everyone should have a basket full of magic. Fill it with a favorite bath salt, a good book, soothing music, a comforting blanket, peppermint foot lotion or a great neck pillow. <br />
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Today I woke up aching all over and walking into walls. Really…my daughter even asked why I walked into the wall. I misjudged the area I had to walk through the doorway. I haven't felt a flare like this in a while, so I looked out the window and there it was. It was grey and cloudy. The clouds looked like they were going to burst with the pressure of the water inside. That pressure, I feel in my head. What I did was putter a bit to get some food, tea and my pills and I bumper carred my way back to bed. I had a bunch on my to-do list but I knew that it would be more frustrating and painful to push myself through the list. I sighed, embraced and accepted that my to-do's will be to-done another time.<br />
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It's so important to know our bodies and to accept each moments. On the days we feel better or even good, we can get two days worth of to-do lists done. Then celebrate!<br />
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Thank you for reading, forwarding and following!!!<br />
TerriAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14693765402080386585noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6001293486178133345.post-47756179311648646142014-03-24T20:45:00.000-04:002014-03-24T20:45:19.233-04:00WAIT…Is This What Normal Feels Like?Today has been a day like no other day in the last few years. <br />
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I woke up refreshed, which took me off guard. I'm so use to waking up to the gentle alarm and slowly increasing simulated sunlight and feeling as though I was running a marathon in the dream state. Today, I opened my eyes and immediately noticed that it was five minutes before my alarm. My eye lids were not sticking to my eyeballs. They were unusually moist. I turned the alarm off before it went off to avoid waking my husband. The process of getting my legs off the bed and sitting up is typically at a snail's pace. I started the process taking it slower than molasses, but felt some energy and strength in my legs. I swung my legs to the floor, sat up and stood…all within seconds. Any other day, if I had tried that, it would have either been excruciatingly painful or I'd be on the floor. Not today! Up and at-um. I think my hair may have even been floating in the wind with the swift movement.<br />
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I reached the floor at the bottom of the steps and paused. I looked back up the staircase and realized that I alternated legs and didn't hold the handrail all the way down. I was tempted to try it again, but I didn't want to push my luck. <br />
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On most days, I throw a long winter coat over my PJ's to drive the kids to school, but not today. Today, I got dressed! I can hardly believe it. A nice fleece top, jeans and sneakers. Not that anyone would notice the difference with the long coat, but I could. Once the kids have been dropped off, I head back home and slowly crawl back into bed with a heating pad. I'll get up for lunch, dinner and the bathroom but my body aches so deeply when I move that it's hard to get anything done.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiurJP1ksLQg7LQHr44XnsG7F0np6f-cBg48MZ2CzsdYtdiw63DHe-NtgiQ_s8naxegXUO-qkCDFk5Zl1i37w6AKj1oSqX6TbiAImHKdTbCXwOjBP3ku0eMbO9xDaJFt74u5ihqcAmoEaw/s1600/Yay!.gif" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiurJP1ksLQg7LQHr44XnsG7F0np6f-cBg48MZ2CzsdYtdiw63DHe-NtgiQ_s8naxegXUO-qkCDFk5Zl1i37w6AKj1oSqX6TbiAImHKdTbCXwOjBP3ku0eMbO9xDaJFt74u5ihqcAmoEaw/s1600/Yay!.gif" height="320" width="320" /></a>I got home from the school run and cleaned the living room, put the laundry away, planned dinner and set up a list of things I could do for the rest of the day. At noon I left for a day of errands, driving in the sun and visiting the great coast of Maine (about 40 minutes from my home). I returned home at dinner time with much accomplished. There was some pain in my neck and torso, but nothing strong enough to knock me down. Since I've been home, I've done about two hours of paperwork and a Skyped tarot card reading. Oh, and I'm writing my blog.<br />
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This day looks a lot like what I observe from most of society. Putting daytime clothes on and physically moving and being productive for most of the sunlit hours. Who knew I'd see this kind of a day again?! What an incredible blessing!<br />
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Now I'm shooting for <i>two</i> 'Normal' days in a row. Whoo Hoo! Three cheers for good days!!!<br />
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Thank you for reading, forwarding and following!!!<br />
Terri<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14693765402080386585noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6001293486178133345.post-8949502003473647372014-03-13T23:01:00.001-04:002014-03-14T15:50:26.109-04:00How Do We Keep Hope Alive?I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia in 2002. My triplets were two years old and the pain in my shoulders prevented me from holding my babies as much as they/ I wanted. Although I've observed my Mom fighting and struggling with Fibro for many years before my diagnosis, I decided that I'd never give up on the possibility of overcoming this illness. I had goals, dreams and babies to raise and support. <br />
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I discovered that yoga was a great way for me to manage the pain of Fibro and exercise helped with the Fog. My determination lead me to becoming a certified yoga instructor and eventually opening my own studio. After a few years of teaching, the yoga began to trigger flares of full body pain. I pushed through; trying different methods of rest, epsom salt baths, heating pads, massage, etc… The pain only got worse. Eventually, the exhaustion took over and I could no longer handle even the slightest amount of stress. A good day would dangle glimmers of hope and a good month would convince me that my efforts were paying off and I was overcoming this illusive illness…until waking up and feeling as though a truck ran over me.<br />
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Each time this cycle of hope and disappointment would make it's rounds, I'd think about ways to stop the emotional roller coaster. An easy way would be to shut down the feelings of hope, in order to avoid the disappointment on the other end. This just doesn't feel as though it would enhance my quality of life. It sounds more like giving up and that's not a concept that works well for me. <br />
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Maybe, just maybe, I'm hoping for the wrong things. My mind has been set on overcoming Fibromyalgia so that I can get back to my life. That life was many years ago. There is a chance that my old life just doesn't fit for me anymore. Come to think of it, the high stress and loads of responsibility that comes with owning and managing my own business <i>don't</i> seem to fit for me anymore. <br />
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I refuse to believe that I no longer have a place for hopes and dreams in my life! I just need to allow them to be realistic to my abilities. I can cook a wonderful dinner for my husband and kids, when I'm feeling up to it. I can enjoy an amazing book as long as I let go of the expectation that I'll remember the last chapter I read. I can be funny, joyful and caring. I can trust my true friends will support and love me for who I am, not what I can or can't do. <br />
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I hope for a day when Fibromyalgia is understood and can be managed and eventually eliminated. It may not be in my lifetime, so until then, I'm keeping hope alive for all who have and will be affected by this illness.<br />
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<b><i>When I can, I will and when I do, I do with all my heart and soul!</i></b><br />
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Thank you for reading, forwarding and following!!!<br />
TerriAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14693765402080386585noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6001293486178133345.post-73509231057330399912014-02-06T09:37:00.000-05:002014-02-06T09:38:13.226-05:00Weather ForecastMy personal experience shows that New England and Fibromyalgia are not a great match. A popular quote says, "If you don't like the weather in New England, just wait a minute."<br />
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I've heard many people with fibromyalgia talk about how it seems as thought the biometric pressure has an impact on pain and stiffness. I also wonder if it has an impact on emotions. Could the change in air pressure be squishing our brains. Would this explain brain fog? I'm hoping wacky theories may inspire some researchers to find some answers for us.<br />
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This Winter, in particular, I've noticed that a few days before a big storm, I begin to experience a headache. The pressure in my head increases as the storm approaches and the day before, I become irritable and my thinking becomes fuzzy. The day of these storms, my brain is completely on the fritz and depression kicks in. A thought will begin and just as quickly leave a blank space. In the middle of sentences, I forget what I was saying and words become jumbled. Is there a word for dyslexia of speech? I also notice that reading is useless. I understand the individual words as I read them but a sentence means nothing. Imagine trying to make sense of a storyline with a sentence like, "Josephine blah de blah happily do re with blah me fa." I think it's only human to experience extreme frustration, confusion and disappointment when we know we are so incredible capable of functioning in the world…most of the time.<br />
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I've wondered if it would be easier if I had brain fog all the time. I would have the opportunity to accept what is and learn how to live my life within the parameters of the fog. I've had extended foggy times lasting 3 or more months. During that time period, I went through the stages of grief and came around to accepting the condition and learning how to function in the world then the fog lifted. I could see clearly, speak full sentences and even go out to tend to my garden without forgetting why I was suddenly standing in the middle of the yard. I was overjoyed about feeling like myself again. My brain felt as though it had been reattached giving me the desire to shout, "I'M ALIVE!" followed by a maniacal laugh. The extremes of living with a brain and no brain, sight and no sight, mobility and no mobility are a huge challenge. I think it would be an easier road acclimating to different abilities than having functionality come and go seemingly randomly.<br />
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Of course, through all of this analysis, my spiritual beliefs emerge. I do believe that the ups and downs of the fibro roller coaster are a part of my life for a reason. I'm learning so much about myself and how the world works. I'm given the opportunity to learn resilience…often. Not only is resilience useful in an ever changing world, it also opens a door to focusing on what is truly important in my life. I've learned that even though I feel more like myself when my faculties are functioning at a high level, the aptness of my body is not who I am. One thing that is important in my life is opening up to the true me. I'm defined by my heart and soul and how I show up in the world, not by my physical or mental abilities. Redefining who I am is my growing edge. It's easy to see what I'm not and I'm on a mission to begin uncovering who I am.<br />
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We all have a process we're going through in life. Some see the process as a fight or struggle and some see it as an opportunity. Most of us can see both sides of the coin but if we begin to put more focus on the opportunity than the struggle, we'll see many more blessings for us in the process. Remember, blessings are not a reward we get at the end. Blessings are a byproduct of our willingness to wake up.<br />
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Thank you for reading, forwarding and following!!!<br />
Terri<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14693765402080386585noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6001293486178133345.post-15093075061383131952014-01-20T22:45:00.000-05:002014-03-14T15:52:55.919-04:00Laughing at MyselfIt's helpful to have a sense of humor when it comes to chronic illness. I think I'd go nuts if I took these fibro fog antics too seriously.<br />
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Last week I was feeling terrible with an upper respiratory bug. These illnesses are a challenge to recognize in the sea of fibromyalgia symptoms. It wasn't until my breathing became labored and a cough appeared that I realized the additional fatigue, digestion issues and foggy focus were exasperated by the virus. <br />
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During this time, I continued to drive my children to school and on this one day, I (or we) had a great laugh. At their school there is a car line at the back of the building. I was sitting in the stopped traffic listening to the joyful noise of happy kids in the morning (well, two out of three isn't bad). I remember my mind beginning to wander to what the day would bring me and carefully calculating how much energy I was beginning that particular day with. Protocol for the car line is that the three front cars let children out and drive off then then next three drive up, drop off and so on. As we sat, the three cars in front of me stopped and students hopped out and entered the school. The cars in front of me drove off in single file and staying in pattern, I began to move the car ahead and continue to drive. As I rounded the corner of the building, passing the drop off points, I heard my son gently say, "Mom?" I politely said, "Yes?" and he replied, "You…we need to get out of the car."<br />
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As soon as they saw me smile, the laughter erupted from all four of us.<br />
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I ended up dropping them off at the side of the building and they walked around elbowing each other and laughing together. If I were lacking a funny bone at that time, I would have missed the gratitude I felt about starting the day on a high note with my three teenagers.<br />
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Thank you for reading, forwarding and following!!!<br />
Terri<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14693765402080386585noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6001293486178133345.post-83856781855224376522014-01-17T11:04:00.000-05:002014-01-17T11:04:40.842-05:00I'm Built for HibernationMy whole life I've struggled through the Winter months. I always thought this time of year was difficult for me because of me. I blamed myself for not being energetic, happy or motivated. As I tried to correct my wrongness or weakness, I spent a lot of time observing my behaviors, what worked and what didn't work to help me be at least tolerant of the dark, cold months. Somehow I developed a belief that there is something wrong with me because I'm unable to be myself for 5, 6 and sometimes 7 months of the year. <br />
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I'm beginning to understand that I do have extreme drops in hormone levels with vitamin D and thyroid. Knowing this is a relief because I can take action to counteract these drops. Also, it helps me understand that I haven't done anything wrong and there is a good chance that beating myself up, about not enjoying New England Winter months, wasn't going to make it better.<br />
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I've decided that I'm going to try to be gentle and compassionate to myself, particularly my seasonal challenges. Instead of fighting against the decreased energy, I'll rest more. Instead of trying to get things done when it feels as though I'm trudging through mud, I'll do only what I can do comfortably. This means that I'll begin to not push myself so hard. <br />
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I can feel and see, over the years, the extreme difference in me from August to February. For years, I've told people that I don't thaw out, from the Winter, until July. I also feel that August is the only month of the year where I feel most like me; the motivated, energetic, smiling, joy filled me. By January I feel like a lump and I dream about a cave of my own with all the food and warmth to last me through the next four month. No…really, ask my husband. I tell him that a warm tiny home with warm food (that I don't have to cook) would be ideal for me. <br />
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During the years of blaming myself for being so uncomfortable with Winters, a cave and an opportunity to hibernate felt like I was running away. It felt like giving up because why would I be so different from others? I was still comparing myself to those around me and felt less than because I wasn't like them.<br />
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I no longer feel less than. For me, I need to slow down and use less energy. It's important for me to learn how to embrace the flow of my internal seasons. A warmer climate, year round, may be helpful, but for now while my kids are in school, I'm taking it down a couple of notches. I will allow myself to put some of my projects on hold and cut down on some of the regular things I do. Now, hibernating sounds and feels like a thoughtful gift to myself.<br />
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This blog is a great tracking system for my personal seasons. During the months when I'm feeling more like myself and not hibernating there are many more posts than the months of hibernation. <br />
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Thanks for reading, forwarding and following!!!<br />
Terri<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14693765402080386585noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6001293486178133345.post-32660251289036580892014-01-09T12:47:00.000-05:002014-01-09T12:47:12.288-05:00Will Leading Technology Help us With Chronic Illness?I just watched a youtube video about Watson. Some of you may recognize this computer as the one that played the game Jeopardy on television. It has been designed to have cognitive computing intelligence. The video I watched, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y_cqBP08yuA" target="_blank">What will you do with Watson</a>, got me thinking about technology and medicine. In a partnership between MSK (Memorial Sloan Kettering) and IBM, they'll be using Watson in the fight against Cancer.<br />
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After watching a few videos, I began to have contrasting feelings around the concept of Watson assisting with patients. Posing the question, what would I do with Watson, I immediately went to my experience with Fibromyalgia. During the 11 years since I was diagnosed, I've met with numerous doctors who have not been equipped with enough information about Fibromyalgia to adequately treat me. The go-to phrase, that I heard often was, "I don't know what to do with you." And because they didn't know what to do with me, I suffered and went through numerous unsuccessful and expensive treatments for many years. I often faced a crossroads of giving up or seeking out yet another doctor in the hopes that I would find help and health one day. I persisted in the shadow of feeling as though I was a cast off or misfit because I had medical issues that are not known or misunderstood. This made me feel invisible and unworthy of helpful treatments, compassion and attention. If the medical specialists don't see my illness as a real illness, does that mean that it doesn't truly exist? NO! It exists and deserves attention. I deserve treatment that works for me and doesn't have a catalog full of side effects (but that's a whole other blog in itself). So, could Watson help people who are in similar situations as me? We are the forgotten children set to wait in line until there's enough independent research done. Then will we get our turn? Will it be too late? How many of us will have given up by then and lived a poor quality of life because medical research hasn't caught up with us?<br />
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For years, it was assumed that my sadness through the cold winter months was because of seasonal depression. Although I had numerous other symptoms pointing to a thyroid issue, the blood tests showed that I was in 'normal range'. With my new doctor, he took my symptoms into consideration at the same level of importance as my blood tests. We discovered that thyroid treatment eliminated the sadness. This is just one example of how medical science doesn't consider the lower edges of their bell curve or symptoms having as much importance as blood tests. Some of us don't fit into the bell and appear to be in normal range for blood tests. It doesn't mean we are less important or less deserving of a high quality of life.<br />
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The topic of research and data being entered into Watson brings up another question. Who is monitoring the information getting loaded into Watson? Will they ensure that the information is independent of the parties that fund research in order to sell more prescriptions? Is Watson working for the betterment of the patients or the engorgement of funder's bank accounts?<br />
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At this time, I'm going to assume that Watson is for the benefit of the patients, with that and lowering medical bills being the highest priorities. In that case, Fibromyalgia patients may benefit as well. There is new research done every day in regards to Fibro and relaying this new information to doctors takes time. Watson could make the information available to doctors at a much faster pace. Medical professionals will not have to take time away to go to conferences to learn about new findings in this area. This information can be accessible in the exam room. Watson will be capable of evaluating the symptoms, blood tests, research and treatments without emotion or stress clouding decision making. I can see how a computer would have the ability to keep the goal of offering the opportunity of the best quality of life and health to each patient. I feel the project of using Watson in health care, has the potential to benefit people by getting them the best knowledge of their diagnosis and treatments faster than ever before.<br />
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Although I've had poor experiences with my diagnosis' and treatments, I believe Watson will be a great improvement to how medical care is handled now. Without my past experiences, I may not have been able to see the benefits as clearly as I see them now. I'd let Watson analyze my medical data and I'm incredibly curious about what he'd spit out.<br />
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Thank you for reading, forwarding and following!!!<br />
TerriAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14693765402080386585noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6001293486178133345.post-28831663320506656472014-01-06T01:50:00.001-05:002014-01-06T01:50:56.551-05:00Let Me Tell You a SecretYou have very important work to do! This is something no one else has agreed to do and only you can do it the way it is meant to be done. You see, we are all an integral piece of the puzzle. Just like the stem of a flower is crucially important for the beautiful yellow tulip. Without the stem, the tulip wouldn't be a tulip. It may not even be. <br />
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You're here for a reason and only you can uncover what that reason is. Many people will try to convince you that they know best but they can only speculate. There is guidance you can use along the way to find your purpose. Watch people who are inspiring to you, listen to your intuition or go to a sweat lodge. Whatever you choose to do to allow your gifts to unfold, start today.<br />
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I believe in you and you should too!<br />
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Thank you for reading, forwarding and following!!!<br />
TerriAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14693765402080386585noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6001293486178133345.post-71283141992610441922013-12-31T17:32:00.000-05:002013-12-31T17:32:01.239-05:00Hello 2014!Of course, 20 years ago, New Year's Resolutions were important to me. I'd think about the things I'd like to give up, begin and resolve in my life. The one I remember most was health and fitness. I sense I wasn't alone with the hope that I'd start a workout routine and continue for the rest of my life. The first year I was successful for one month and the following year I made it through a few months. Each time, Spring would come and I'd realize that my New Year's Resolutions were long gone. At the time, I'd get a bit upset with myself for not completing or continuing with the plan. Looking back, I realize that I was just practicing and building new routines. Each time I went back to creating a fitness routine, I was able to carry it for a longer time.<br />
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About 10 years ago, I shifted from making resolutions to setting intentions. This must have been around the time Oprah was talking about integrity and intentions. At least she gave my first introduction to these concepts. Setting intentions gave me more flexibility and patients with myself. It felt a bit less forceful. I put less pressure on myself to be perfect with the intentions I set but that didn't help me feel less upset with myself when things fell apart.<br />
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A couple of years ago, I stopped writing down any resolutions or intentions. I just took a short time to think about how I wanted to continue living and how I imagined living a better life. I consciously took what I liked from the past and added some new options to try out and maybe they'd bring me joy too.<br />
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I've had a transformational year, personally. My health has been a huge challenge and declining for years. 2013 was the first year since 2002, I've felt as though my health was improving. I feel more accepting of myself and my abilities. I no longer feel that I need to do everything and try everything and go, go, go. The guilt of staying still for more than an hour has diminished. I had some help with that since I was unable to walk for days at a time. What a gift! I was forced to stop everything in order to weed out the most important things to do. That area of growth extends out to people too. I no longer feel I have something to prove…to anyone. <br />
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As I look forward to 2014, I notice a good and peaceful feeling inside. According to numerology, it'll be a lucky year and I feel it'll be a year full of gifts. Whether they come disguised as challenges or celebrations, this will be one of the best years ever!<br />
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These are the things I'm looking forward to for 2014;<br />
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* Using my energy in the most gratifying areas<br />
* A visit to see my wonderful 97 year old grandfather in Fl<br />
* Working with Dr. Bier on the next levels of my healing<br />
* Friday game nights with my family<br />
* Growing in my marriage<br />
* Cultivating new and old friendships<br />
* Smelling the flowers and grass and trees and herbs and…<br />
* Volunteering often<br />
* Watching, in wonder, as my children transition to High School<br />
* Learning more about how I can be a better global citizen<br />
* Live joy, give joy, teach joy, cultivate joy<br />
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I wish each and every one of you a Joyous New Year! Happy 2014!<br />
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Thank you for reading, forwarding and following!!!<br />
TerriAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14693765402080386585noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6001293486178133345.post-74896840482472881632013-12-27T19:52:00.000-05:002013-12-27T19:56:01.586-05:00A Look Back on 2013I came across a cool feature on my phone. It is a video creator that lets you choose photos or videos taken on your phone and creates a slideshow or video of memories. I just completed a review of 2013 using just the photos on my phone. <br />
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This process got me to thinking about the year that is coming to an end and what I've experienced, how I've grown and the pleasures I enjoyed. I tend to have a full life and this year was no different. Here are some of the memories that were stirred while making my year end video.<br />
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* A two year process with my disability claim ended. I received approval and an immense weight was lifted from my shoulders. With the absence of this stress, I was able to move forward with my healing process in my own way.<br />
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* I found an amazing doctor and am experiencing amazing healing through mind, body and spirit.<br />
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* I started this blog with the intent of recording my emotions, experiences and life challenge with fibromyalgia and to remind myself to keep an eye out for the gifts. I also shared it publicly on the off chance that others out there may be able to relate, be encouraged, inspired and motivated to take action in their own healing process. I've had surprising results, amazing feedback and followers from 39 countries. <br />
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* My family said 'goodbye' to a wonderful person who meant a great deal to us. Nancy, we love you and will always hold memories, of times together, close to our hearts.<br />
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* I'm taking a course through The Venus Project and loving it.<br />
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* I've opened to getting to know and spending time with like-minded peeps. I've made a couple of neat new friends.<br />
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* My children have impressed me, again. Their determination, dedication and focus to take a leap of faith and apply for private high schools shows me that they are willing to walk their own path in life. Many of their friends are not taking the same steps, some are discouraged by their parents and some don't feel they would get in. My three have shown that they are not afraid to try.<br />
<br />
* My husband shows me how strong he is every day. He takes care of two senior parents. His father is 87, lives on his own and is a proud man. His mother has medical challenges and we moved her from her home of 20+ years to a nursing home. I know these changes and stresses of caring for parents has been hard on him and he has been a rock through it all. <br />
<br />
I think I could go on and on although, I've probably posted most of it in my blog through the year. Strangely, I have to go back periodically and read my own posts because I don't remember them. Fibro brain, ya know. <br />
<br />
I'm grateful for every moment of 2013! Stay tuned for a post on looking at what I'd like to do in 2014.<br />
<br />
Thank you for reading, forwarding, and following!!!<br />
TerriAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14693765402080386585noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6001293486178133345.post-19230997764373344202013-12-19T22:19:00.000-05:002013-12-19T22:19:38.646-05:00My Blog's Been Hijacked <div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Normally, a
sensational woman by the name of Terri takes some time from her day to sit and
write what I call “words of wisdom” in order to both help others who are
dealing with the multitude of effects that fibro brings and help herself by
(what I feel is) purging herself of the day’s events.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Often times, she
mentions that while dealing with what may come day after day, she gets help
from her three beautiful children and her (her words not mine) amazing husband.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Tonight, instead
of the usual blog, allowing you to see the world through her eyes, I would like
to share with you how she is seen. I believe if there were anyone who could
give you some insight on this woman… the woman you have decided to follow… it
would be me. I am her husband.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>First, may I say, before anything else… she is
the real deal.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have seen first
hand the lows of how hard this disease can bring her and have been there to
enjoy the moments in time when she is having a “good day.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Being sensitive
to a multitude of medications, I have been there on numerous rides to the
hospital because her breathing was labored, her throat would not allow her to
swallow or her blood pressure would drop incredibly low.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have watched
her cry in pain while her swollen feet and stiffened legs made it nearly
impossible to get through her morning knowing her only comfort would be wrapped
up in a cozy comforter while regaining her strength in our bed.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I could go on
rehashing the stories of what you’ve already heard from Terri but instead, I
would like to touch on the soul within the body.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How this woman
knows no defeat.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How this woman
gives everything she can, every day. Even on the tough ones.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How this woman is
a true inspiration to anyone who actually takes the time to sit and talk with
her and get to know her.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve truly never
met a person who has had life challenge her in so many different ways and who
will simply not allow a giving up attitude to happen.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think one of
the reasons I found her so perfect for me so long ago and still today has to do
with my love for the movie “Rocky” and the sequels that followed. Anyone who
knows me knows how these movies has affected my life from the time I was a
young child.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Terri has that FIGHT
in her. She always has that FIGHT in her. A partial quote from the last movie
is, “It’s not about how hard you can hit, it’s about how hard you can get hit
and keep moving forward. That’s how winning is done.”</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgky_RsPtfIA08fiwjE2Yt12yZwElN2sXSwGoEIYVp6O_nUWgeBNDzNBjZ0YCNWXaw75-fZNYWZYBQQA0Z7ZSr6Qzpw7o80wi_LgCzAFahJo95fgHCG3PWKL5KtUqZFTru3NdTW5dNk8YM/s1600/rocky_balboa.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgky_RsPtfIA08fiwjE2Yt12yZwElN2sXSwGoEIYVp6O_nUWgeBNDzNBjZ0YCNWXaw75-fZNYWZYBQQA0Z7ZSr6Qzpw7o80wi_LgCzAFahJo95fgHCG3PWKL5KtUqZFTru3NdTW5dNk8YM/s1600/rocky_balboa.jpg" /></a></div>
<o:p></o:p><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She could have
written those lines.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Through it all,
she could have decided to fight the good fight and take a bitter look at the
world. She could have looked at life with a why me attitude or I’ll just push
on because I have to mentality.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not my wife.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Every day, I hear
of some plan or idea to help the environment or a better way to live on this
planet. She pours herself into online classes and talks with others who are
trying to make a difference in this world. She creates tasks for each upcoming
day. All while knowing that that next day may bring a change to the chalk
writing on the blackboard in her mind. The next day may erase half of what she
has written or even clean the board entirely.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But she picks up
the chalk and writes out a plan or lesson for the very next day.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her endless need
to be there for her children is an incredible sight to see. No matter how she
feels… even with those swollen feet… she will get them ready for school and
drive them there in the morning. Help them with all kinds of paperwork even if
it means doing it from bed. Teaches them to be good, peaceful and loving beings
without an inkling of look at what this world has done to me. It’s always about
what can you do in this world.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I talk with my
wife all the time and I know of no one who can give better advice or a good
kick in the butt when I need it.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She is a woman of
passion, drive and intellect. But most of all, she is all that is good in the
world. A beautiful soul. And believe me, you have found the right blog to
follow.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve read every
one too.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Thank you for reading, following and forwarding!!!<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Ray<o:p></o:p></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14693765402080386585noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6001293486178133345.post-48264621655344537062013-12-17T15:14:00.000-05:002013-12-17T15:14:27.515-05:00Ouch, Dammit! I've been feeling the wave that started with stiffness and being sore. It's been some time since I've had a full flare.<br />
<br />
This morning my eyes opened and I wanted to shout, "Hello Fibro!" The temperature outside was -2 and my body hurts all over. On a scale from 1-10, my pain is an 8. As I pushed through the stiffness and pain, I stood to wake the kids for school. The bottoms of my feet felt as though the bones had multiple fractures. Hobbling about to get food and pills and the pain was joined by rolling tears.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJ3m-83xcFe-_2wdeZsWeD9_KwZoCGm1qNnFoonZrPjyPNjPDtqCsOMNrXwfHiMgYHsjpo5TuA30a2ixp6neDwotFJZhvp3l2zT2m2uaGFyvaPvnK263ipczznBmlxD_zvG8EpqNV-4Ak/s1600/shoe+cartoon+walk+in+my+shoes.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJ3m-83xcFe-_2wdeZsWeD9_KwZoCGm1qNnFoonZrPjyPNjPDtqCsOMNrXwfHiMgYHsjpo5TuA30a2ixp6neDwotFJZhvp3l2zT2m2uaGFyvaPvnK263ipczznBmlxD_zvG8EpqNV-4Ak/s320/shoe+cartoon+walk+in+my+shoes.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
Within an hour, I had already kicked into my 'alternate' life strategy. This is the life strategy that I can jump (gently) into when my body isn't as mobile or healthful. The first step was to determine if I could complete the plan for the day with the arrival of different abilities. The next step was to create a plan for how the things I'm unable to complete will get completed. This includes Christmas shopping. <br />
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What it comes down to is a day (or more) in bed with the heating pad. The online work I want to complete will be done in short increments with papers strewn across the bed top. Finally, Christmas shopping is most likely going to be done from a wheelchair pushed by my amazing and supportive husband.<br />
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Each flare gives me the opportunity to strengthen my resilience; adjusting to the changes more quickly.<br />
<br />
Time to close the valve on the personal energy outlet. Must reserve what is there and generate more through rest.<br />
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Thank you for reading, forwarding and following!!!<br />
TerriAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14693765402080386585noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6001293486178133345.post-45253844857372066502013-12-13T10:06:00.000-05:002013-12-13T10:06:53.853-05:00Under The WeatherI kept hearing myself say that I was 'under the weather', to describe how I was feeling and realized that I truly didn't know what the phrase meant. Of course, I had to google it. Many sources say that it's a phrase that comes from a maritime source. It has to do with rough waters and adverse weather while out at sea. Here's what I found:<br />
<br />
<span style="background-color: #f8edda; color: #393318; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;">"Under the weather. To feel ill. Originally it meant to feel seasick or to be adversely affected by bad weather. The term is correctly 'under the weather bow' which is a gloomy prospect; the weather bow is the side upon which all the rotten weather is blowing." From "Salty Dog Talk: The Nautical Origins of Everyday Expressions" by Bill Beavis and Richard G. McCloskey (Sheridan House, Dobbs Ferry, N.Y., 1995. First published in Great Britain, 1983).</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-NDPBhARW-Yq0js9aiCE3R8ZpY3Og2jW6uSuMiJ-oMq6BGAglHytW8XdzB1YX1PqM2ok6lJK99KmF1rlFPh_gO9Bt3-eAOUmVwBo4kYd84Ji28w9o4ChbmgIszWrXXQQBj5ErsSetuXk/s1600/under+the+weather.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-NDPBhARW-Yq0js9aiCE3R8ZpY3Og2jW6uSuMiJ-oMq6BGAglHytW8XdzB1YX1PqM2ok6lJK99KmF1rlFPh_gO9Bt3-eAOUmVwBo4kYd84Ji28w9o4ChbmgIszWrXXQQBj5ErsSetuXk/s1600/under+the+weather.jpg" /></a></div>
<span style="background-color: #f8edda; color: #393318; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="line-height: 20px;">So, in Terri world, it seems to fit. Although, I'm not out at sea, I am affected by weather patterns. I haven't experienced a fibro-flare in quite some time and then… it hit yesterday. I don't quite have a clear </span></span><span style="line-height: 20px;">explanation for why my body went into flare, but I'll do my best to make something up. I'll be sure to make it sound convincing, too.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif;"><span style="line-height: 20px;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif;"><span style="line-height: 20px;">I've been having difficulty swallowing the 10+ supplement pills at each meal. It all began the day I was not as mindful of my meal and supplements, while I ate. After about 6 pills, it felt as though they had stacked up, end to end, in my esophagus. Once I noticed this strange sensation, I chalked it up to not paying attention and taking them too quickly. About a week later, a pill got stuck in the center of my chest. I could have sworn that it was sideways in my esophagus, refusing to complete its journey. I had visions of the cartoon character who swallowed a spoon and you could see the outline of the spoon as it moved down the neck. There was stabbing pain and I had to stop what I was doing, go lie down, relax and breath until the stubborn little thing decided to move on. Pills got stuck in my chest a few times, then it felt as thought they were getting lodged in my throat. Food, water, tea; nothing would push them down.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif;"><span style="line-height: 20px;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif;"><span style="line-height: 20px;">I contacted my trusted Dr. and he suggested that I stop taking the many pills and stick to just the liquid supplements for a few days. If there was some irritation or inflammation in the esophagus, these days would allow for some healing. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif;"><span style="line-height: 20px;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif;"><span style="line-height: 20px;">Two days after cutting back on the pills, the pain in my head and shoulders returned. Another day went by and my feet began to ache and then my legs and hips. Today, I'm hobbling about, holding onto walls and tables to get around. Needless to say, hobbling isn't helping, so I've put myself to bed. I decided to begin taking the supplements with the hope that the pain will subside, as it did before, with these treatments.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif;"><span style="line-height: 20px;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif;"><span style="line-height: 20px;">If the flare is not related to the lack of supplement support, maybe it is the weather. New England has been really, really, 2 degrees (wind chill), cold for a couple of days. I'll surely find out soon if the pain is reduced before the cold weather goes away. If it's not the weather, I'm going to have to find another phrase for how I'm feeling.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif;"><span style="line-height: 20px;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif;"><span style="line-height: 20px;">Thanks for reading, forwarding and following!!!</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif;"><span style="line-height: 20px;">Terri</span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #f8edda; color: #393318; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;"><br /></span>
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14693765402080386585noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6001293486178133345.post-77620294763004758962013-12-06T15:49:00.000-05:002013-12-06T15:49:40.486-05:00 Whacked by a Canoe Paddle It seems as though the increasing lack of sun, this time of year, has a huge effect on me. Now, I know my family members who are reading this are saying, "ya think?!". Maybe I see it more clearly because I'm more mature and last year, I was able to recognize the peeps who truly support me. Having that support has made a world of difference because I can trust that when I'm having a tough day, they'll be honest with me and they know who I really am. They know that my struggle is not who I am and that I need a bit more of their support through the bumps in the road.<br />
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I've experienced some wonderful progress with my health and I'm incredibly grateful that I never gave up hope. I had a choice. I could have continued to be put down, no believed, and be taking prescription drugs with all the side effects. With that choice I'd probably be laying in bed 6-7 days a week needing my family to make me meals, manage my pills and lose all my independence. Come to think of it, if I had continued with the recommendations of mainstream medicine, I'd have a nifty colostomy bag to be changed on a regular basis too.<br />
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My other choice could have been to stop seeing any doctor and stop my search for a healthy life. If I had gone down that road, there's a chance I'd be in a padded room with locked doors and a purse for my colostomy bag called fido. I'd also have severe pain all over my body and a wheelchair.<br />
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I chose to hold onto hope, searching for someone or a group to guide me toward a healthy life. I'm now fibro-flare free, my trigger points have calmed down, my digestion is improving and I recently had enough stamina to have four 'normal' days in a row. Each day, I was able to get up, make breakfasts, lunches, drive the kids to school, housework, paperwork, cook lunch, cook dinner, enjoy my family and not once did my body need to lay down. This is a huge change from my body screaming at me every couple of hours to go lay down. The fatigue and pain were so great it brought tears to my eyes. The excitement bubbles up in me when I think about how I've found the road that leads me to a sustainable healthy life.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXht8eDuKRTLIgK6YClf0v2BbfDQqlRxqzi53M7dBQLc_kK-j6KDqCY-A0meDRlkp_30g5n8t-L7S45ZiTNpReCDXRMquAyFZuCU2yyLPCFUkrbPDmQxk8lPodLfgw7NA35J4N5knPS5k/s1600/Winter+depression.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="165" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXht8eDuKRTLIgK6YClf0v2BbfDQqlRxqzi53M7dBQLc_kK-j6KDqCY-A0meDRlkp_30g5n8t-L7S45ZiTNpReCDXRMquAyFZuCU2yyLPCFUkrbPDmQxk8lPodLfgw7NA35J4N5knPS5k/s320/Winter+depression.jpg" width="320" /></a>One area that needs some attention is how my body reacts to diminishing sunlight. It's a good thing I don't live in those areas of the world that are dark for months. I'd go bat bleep crazy! I've been feeling tugs of sadness here and there. I notice and take note, but today, the waterworks began. I know what this means because it's a pattern that accompanies the winter months. Hand-in-hand like best friends frolicking through the fields…of cold and snow. They seem to be very happy together but I feel <br />
terrible. My emotions go from upset to concerned to angry to sad to embarrassed to full-out ugly blubbering. Sometimes all within an hour. It's quite exhausting ta' boot! Today has felt as though I got whacked by a canoe paddle, on an emotional level.<br />
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Have I mentioned my doctor? The great Naturopathic doctor…Dr. Bier. If I haven't said it in the bunch of posts prior, I have the best doctor. He hears me, he listens, we're partners on my healing journey. I saw him today and we are taking action with the winter blues pattern. I am confident that this challenge will also be one that I can look back on and smile because of how much I grew and learned from it.<br />
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It's sometimes difficult to share the truth about chronic illness, but I think it is much more important to share the not-so-pretty parts to help people understand the hidden struggles we go through. I also share to remind others with chronic illness that they are not alone and to remind myself and others to keep an eye out for the gifts.<br />
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Thanks for reading, forwarding and following!!!<br />
Terri<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14693765402080386585noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6001293486178133345.post-28903322734429235402013-12-04T20:48:00.000-05:002013-12-04T20:48:35.710-05:00Today's Struggle<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><i>The Struggles of Today</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;"><i>Are The</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><i>Wisdom of Tomorrow</i></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
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We are all in this together! Every person knows sorrow but does every person know joy? Take the gifts of the challenges and turn them into gold!</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
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Thanks for reading, forwarding and following!!!</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
Terri</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14693765402080386585noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6001293486178133345.post-89923519912513503252013-12-02T22:28:00.000-05:002013-12-02T22:28:14.967-05:00No Struggles, Just OpportunitiesWe're seeing and experiencing more struggles, around us than ever before. I just watched a movie, <a href="http://crossroadsfilm.com/watch/" target="_blank">Crossroads: Labor Pains of a New Worldview</a> and was pleased to see that there are others like me. I believe that what others may define as hardship, pain, struggle or a crappy week are indications of change. Knowing this, we have the choice to anticipate how we want to move through the inevitable changes. They don't just go away. As we know, putting off change because of fear or denial doesn't actually eliminate the shifts we must make. We are evolutionary beings living in an ever changing world. What makes us think we are all powerful; finding a place of contentment and keeping it that way for the rest of our lives? The only constant in life is change. Knowing this, we have the ability to cooperate with change instead of challenge it.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAGsynCF6twoDunePLBUyfggKO_HIhHm1JrFIaO5Aqs5ABsn0tSMUUVyoA8nsRB3cw_-7INCcs_3_Hfjb0DQBWqOQBLMGjVgNYU5kSAVPt9K71r78kHxmVYdFUvi9OHCnZTKiTDraQAm4/s1600/the+only+constant+in+life....jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAGsynCF6twoDunePLBUyfggKO_HIhHm1JrFIaO5Aqs5ABsn0tSMUUVyoA8nsRB3cw_-7INCcs_3_Hfjb0DQBWqOQBLMGjVgNYU5kSAVPt9K71r78kHxmVYdFUvi9OHCnZTKiTDraQAm4/s1600/the+only+constant+in+life....jpg" /></a>Lets look at the struggle. The movie I mentioned above showed that we are experiencing 66% more natural disasters now than we did in the year 2000. That's only 13 years for such a huge change in disasters. Weather…(oops, just cracked myself up) Whether we are looking at the cause being global warming or Mother Earth trying to communicate with us, the fact of the matter is that these disasters are continuing to happen. Sometimes things get shaken up to wake people up. Earthquakes, hurricanes, tornados, tsunamis, etc. The world is way out of balance. All these things as well as the current state of society contribute to the chaos we're feeling, the day-to-day challenges we're facing and the difficult decisions we're having to make.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhniw-Dy0XTZVoJvg_NJIfdTadOPISG7xShQ8ldiHUfMr8w42zDEtIdMqCfIk02Ws7jo0bg58ESDdWHaFOjmqR97uspaNRfD8d_Tjaa_H-h-C_p0GXj8DuDyr6a86_AHVwl2HhsOwdQSOU/s1600/we+can't+solve+our+problems.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhniw-Dy0XTZVoJvg_NJIfdTadOPISG7xShQ8ldiHUfMr8w42zDEtIdMqCfIk02Ws7jo0bg58ESDdWHaFOjmqR97uspaNRfD8d_Tjaa_H-h-C_p0GXj8DuDyr6a86_AHVwl2HhsOwdQSOU/s1600/we+can't+solve+our+problems.jpg" /></a><br />
Einstein said, "We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them" Here's our chance to take on a new perspective of the problems we are facing. What if there were a way for us to reverse global warming? Would you run out and take action if there were a way to save our civilization? Maybe that example is too big. Try this. What if your chronic illness was a way of your body telling you that you have emerging gifts that could bless those around you? Would you treat yourself differently? Would you expect to be treated with respect by the nay-sayers? <br />
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Do we as a world have the courage to look at things differently? If so, I believe we will see that these struggles are opportunities to learn, grow and change with the ever flowing oceans, the ever turning planets and the ever burning sun. We are surrounded by action and motion. <br />
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Just the word 'opportunity' creates a feeling of joy and possibility. It awakens our curiosity, like a child exploring the woods in the back yard. Adults can question the world, be curious and explore. There is nothing keeping us from looking at what is going on all around us and seeing possibility for something new and intriguing. Aren't you just a little bit curious?<br />
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Thanks for reading forwarding and following!!!<br />
Terri<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14693765402080386585noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6001293486178133345.post-76536559076416552452013-11-24T19:03:00.000-05:002013-11-24T19:03:29.433-05:00Sharing The ChoresThere was no way I could keep up with cleaning and management of the household while healing my body. I enjoy living in a simplistic and clean home. My ideal living environment would be a totally Zen'd out open floor plan with very little stuff. The few pieces of furniture and things would be functional and art pieces with meaning.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgn6N_RQz5K6Cip5YcjIAldziog5uAMOt1fu4CrwGtAInrfuGbnHC87gOXmm3K57tqiUBzsyXnPfNiyG92OhRb-ZNZr9q6zhrnY8jKBqwu-pMWTAoJEu-k_Ia__93AvzCvIoIK5C-4MSRA/s1600/daily-chores.gif" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgn6N_RQz5K6Cip5YcjIAldziog5uAMOt1fu4CrwGtAInrfuGbnHC87gOXmm3K57tqiUBzsyXnPfNiyG92OhRb-ZNZr9q6zhrnY8jKBqwu-pMWTAoJEu-k_Ia__93AvzCvIoIK5C-4MSRA/s1600/daily-chores.gif" height="320" width="317" /></a>Since I live in a three bedroom, one bath Ranch with my husband and triplets, I'll settle for clean and organized. It became quite painful and exhausting, trying to keep up with the accumulating stuff. There's the dirty dishes, laundry, dust, school bags, shoes, mail, projects (mostly mine), electronics with cords for charging and the ever floating remotes. Aarrrggggggh!<br />
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I've adopted a new phrase, Divide and Conquer. Now, I don't think the original intention of that phrase has anything to do with creating a livable home, but that's how I'm going to define it. Everyone pitches in…well almost everyone, but I'll get back to that later. <br />
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Everyone knows what they are responsible for when it comes to upkeep of our home. My son has dishes on Sunday's, my youngest daughter has dishes on Mondays, Ray does them on Tuesdays and so on. Some of the chores are specifically done for the weekly allowance and some are done because we all must pitch in to keep a nice home. So that brings me back to the comment about…well almost everyone. My son is saving up for a laptop for High School and my oldest daughter doesn't like chores, so they both capitalized on their situations. He does her chores and gets her allowance. Everyone's happy.<br />
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What I didn't expect from all of us contributing our gifts, talents and time to creating a nice space to live in, was the shift in everyone's actions. We are using less dishes, every day, because no one likes to do them. The less they use, the fewer dishes we have. Cups are being reused throughout the day, a sandwich needs no plate and my son has joked about trying to figure out how to not dirty something for soup. The family members are putting there things away more often than not because they may be the person chosen to clean that room on Saturday. The leftovers in the fridge are being eaten more often now because no one wants to cook with a pan…it would have to be washed.<br />
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We have turned out to be a Reuse, Reduce, Recycle family. I'm so proud of us!!! Now, if I could get them all to help me build a tiny home from all recycled materials, that'd be awesome!<br />
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Thanks for reading, forwarding and following!!!<br />
TerriAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14693765402080386585noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6001293486178133345.post-46114979002156462372013-11-22T11:46:00.000-05:002013-11-22T11:52:50.253-05:00I love finding information about what may help us get better. I stumbled across this and felt compelled to share.<br />
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I sure hope this helps!<br />
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Thanks for reading, forwarding and following!!!<br />
TerriAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14693765402080386585noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6001293486178133345.post-3746446266748853922013-11-18T15:07:00.000-05:002013-11-18T15:07:34.665-05:00My First Day Tai Chi'ingMy doctor heard me when I explained that exercise has always allowed me to tap into some energy. Ever since High School, I've been doing some sort of cardio exercise. It seemed to me that if I didn't sweat, I wasn't getting much out of the task of exercising my body. I used it as a cleansing of both body and mind; allowing my soul to see clearly.<br />
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At my sickest, I pushed myself to get out and run or something between a walk, wobble and jog. Even in the winter months I'd force myself to get out of bed in the wee hours of the morning, bundle up and get out the door. <br />
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Exercise seemed to be all I had left in my hopes to overcome the debilitating effects of fibromyalgia. Other doctors told me to stop because it was too hard on my body, but I couldn't risk handing over the last hope I had. Dr. Bier heard me. He told me to continue to jog, if that's what made me feel better. He also suggested that I use a martial arts to build and strengthen my chi (life energy). <br />
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I ran for another two weeks after Dr. Bier's advice and then I noticed the urge to push myself wasn't as strong. There was definitely a shift going on in my consciousness and my body. Then last week I decided to go on youtube to try a beginner's Tai Chi class.<br />
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It was frustrating at first because the pace was much slower than my general day-to-day pace. I took this as a sign to slow down even more…consciously. I followed the instructions, allowed a flow of the movements and caught myself wanting to do a Tai Chi version of Americanized Vinyasa Yoga. I taught this yoga for many years. It flows from one movement to the next, connecting the breath to the movement and it can move quickly. I held back from changing the Tai Chi I was learning. It occurred to me that this ancient martial art has lasted through the generations and studies have shown that it is of great benefit for the flow of energy. <br />
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I'll need to work on being in the moment no matter how fast or slow the moments come. I spent a great deal of time learning the movements and being in my head most of the time. I'm sure with practice, the movements will be second nature and my brain will have the opportunity to get out of the way.<br />
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Surprisingly, I had normal achy muscles the next day. I give Tai Chi one and a half thumbs up. The half of thumb is only my hesitation to make it part of my routine. <br />
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With time, I'm sure I'll be Tai Chi'ing at least three times a week.<br />
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Thanks for reading, forwarding and following!!!<br />
TerriAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14693765402080386585noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6001293486178133345.post-24585828512481773142013-11-17T11:55:00.000-05:002013-11-17T11:55:15.159-05:00My Hair Follicles HurtFibromyalgia is such a strange syndrome. Pain bounces from one part of the body to another. It hurts to be hugged at times. My fillings ache on occasion. There are even times when my eyesight becomes blurry. I own a pair of glasses just for these incidences.<br />
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I woke up today with a massive cowlick. I gently crawled out of bed, coercing my feet to cooperate with my legs and when I slowly passed by the mirror, I saw the aftermath of whatever turmoil caused my restless sleep. First of all, I take five different sleep aids to tame the midnight jogs with my eyes closed. My guess is that last night, if I wasn't jogging, maybe I was dreaming about being at a head banging concert. Or maybe just dreaming about my hair being licked by a cow. Just one area on the top of my head, toward the back, was standing on end. With long hair, that is quite a task to achieve. It stood about three inches up then the rest of the strands bent and cascaded downward…and not in the pretty way. <br />
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I stopped at the mirror and ran my hands through my hair, trying to look less frightening…or would that be frightened? As my fingers gently touched my head, I felt the sensation of something yanking on my hair. Thinking that my ring may have gotten tangled, I went to take off the ring that I removed a day prior. I tried to just pat down the craziest parts when shooting pain scurried through my scalp. I was able to touch the ends of my hair with no pain, but anywhere near the scalp was feeling like a full out hair pulling cat fight. <br />
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There are many symptoms of my fibromyalgia that I have not experienced in over 6 months. The extreme body aches, loss of the mobility in my legs, extreme exhaustion, brain fog, etc. Dr. Bier, through exam, tells me that there is improvement in my health and I have a long way to go to reach a healthy status. It's one thing to hear him give me the good news of improvement, but just the slightest bit of improvement makes me feel really healthy.<br />
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I'm grateful that my body is communicating what Dr. Bier is reporting as well. I may have improvement, and the reminders for me are these small signs of "not there yet". My crazy painful follicles are a wonderful sign telling me to continue to take it easy, follow the healing plan and keep listening.<br />
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Thank you for reading, forwarding and following!!!<br />
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TerriAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14693765402080386585noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6001293486178133345.post-19532799988595263322013-11-11T19:44:00.001-05:002013-11-12T20:28:50.565-05:00I've Been Raving About This Doctor! Listen and Find Out Why.<a href="http://www.blogtalkradio.com/rustie/2012/05/23/livingthrivingguest-dr-biernaturopathic-acupuncturist#.UoF5b1cJMUt.blogger">Living&amp;Thriving:Guest Dr Bier,Naturopathic &amp; Acupuncturist 05/23 by Rustie | Lifestyle Podcasts</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.humannaturenaturalhealth.com/" target="_blank">Dr. Bier's Website</a><br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14693765402080386585noreply@blogger.com0