Showing posts with label tears. Show all posts
Showing posts with label tears. Show all posts

Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Pain Makes Me Cry

I'm in the midst of a very good journey toward sustainable health!  My energy levels are more consistent, my moods are definitely more consistent (you can even ask my family) and my thought process has been clearer.  I would say that there is more than welcome improvement, after two weeks of the Naturopathic way.  I would also say that there is a ways to go.

I'm feeling as though I'm on a much deserved road trip and there are small sights to visit along the way.  I'm pulling over to a unique tourist attraction with curiosity and wonder.  Think...The Largest Rubber Band Ball in the World.  It's interesting and a good place to stop, but it's only the first stop on this journey.  There is a realization that when I reach a level of sustainable health, it's not the final journey on the road to health, just subsequent and exciting trips.

During the last couple of days, I've noticed a slip in my energy and moods.  I'm aware that my digestion is struggling and that, in the past has been a cause of my energy and mood shifts.  Today, I woke up feeling sluggish and not rested.  After my daily walk/jog (or wog), I felt nauseous with abdominal pain. I went to rest and fell asleep for about an hour.  The pain didn't subside, but was manageable with no movement and no stress.  Of course, at lunch time I got up to make myself lunch, forgetting that I wasn't moving because it caused pain.  The memory returned very quickly when the pain hit, "Oh, I was in bed all morning because walking around hurt."  Sometimes I'm three prongs short of a fork :)

I walked to the kitchen and forgot why I was there.  The tears began to flow and my son asked me if I was okay and looked at the hand that was holding my stomach.  I didn't even realize I was holding my stomach.  Here...I have some work to do.  I need to learn how to reverse the 'shut off pain to the brain' switch.  I designed this switch in order to accomplish the 'suppose to' list.  Now, I know that there is nothing I'm suppose to do or have to do.  I need to turn that switch so I can allow my body to communicate it's needs again.

My son offered to cook my lunch and I went back to bed in a gush of tears.  My husband took care of the time sensitive (today) issues and I've rested enough to have energy to spare for my blog :D.

I'm obviously learning some great lessons around how to turn the phone off, ask for help and forward any children's requests to Ray during times of extreme healing.


Thanks for reading, following and forwarding my posts!!!
Terri

Friday, June 14, 2013

Doing What I Know Helps Even When it's Hard

I want so badly to be able to focus on my family; triplets and husband.  My kids recently got involved with the film industry and modeling.  I am passionate about supporting their dreams and exploration in the world.  After a month of waiting to hear about some work, the kids have been very patient and today, they got booked for a movie.  They'll be extras, which is a great place to begin.  I'm so happy for them and can't wait to let them know that they will be on set on Monday.

The overwhelm I feel is around my illnesses, my multiple doctor's appointments and the daily in-the-moment status.  Today, I've been out of the house and a bit more active than I've been all week.

 It feels as though the movement is causing some physical and emotional discomfort.  Experiencing Fibromyalgia for 10 years and I still have days when I feel like this is just weird!  Why is my movement causing discomfort.  I just want to be in bed, and that may be the depression talking.  Sadness is always tugging from within and I keep it at bay most of the time.  Today, the sadness is seeping out my pours.  I feel emotional bubbling just under my skin and my eyes are leaky.

I planned to go swimming after my doctor's appointment this morning, but forgot my swim bag and missed my window of pool time.  It may seem counter-intuitive with the discomfort in my body, but I'm going to go for a joggle.  Just maybe the energy in my body is stuck and needs some shaking up.  A wobbly jog or slow walk can only do my mind and body good, as long as I keep it moderate.  I tend to overdue it once I get outdoors.

I'll be back in a bit to finish this blog and let you know how it goes... Feel free to read and comment on some of my other posts until I get back (elevator music playing).


Oh, you're still here.  Excellent!  It was a success.  Getting out into the fresh air and some exercise was helpful.  I feel, well, cleansed.  I do think it was an energy build up, as well as toxins that needed to be released.  I'm not so overwhelmed, I'm much more in the moment and the sadness has subsided (not gone, but better).  It can be so hard to follow through with what I know helps when all I want to do is crawl into bed.

One more thing before I go to get ready to tell the kids the good news about being in a movie.  While on my runish/walkish exercise, I was again presented with some 'breadcrumbs'.  At first I didn't realize they were signs, but Universe really knows what I need, in the moment.  Heading down the street, a shiny object caught my eye (ok, those of you who know me...sparkly things do distract me), and when I looked at it I realized it was a nut.  Not the type you eat, but he kind that a bolt goes through.  No big deal, there are a lot of junk things on the side of the road.  On my way back home, something caught my eye and it was another nut.  Two...and I know there are no coincidences, so I had to giggle.  That
was my turning point, the giggle.  So, I guess I'm either nuts or I have a screw loose :)  Either way, I'm feeling better and I'm proud of myself for pushing through to do what I know helps me heal.






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