My Blog's Been Hijacked

     Normally, a sensational woman by the name of Terri takes some time from her day to sit and write what I call “words of wisdom” in order to both help others who are dealing with the multitude of effects that fibro brings and help herself by (what I feel is) purging herself of the day’s events.

     Often times, she mentions that while dealing with what may come day after day, she gets help from her three beautiful children and her (her words not mine) amazing husband.

     Tonight, instead of the usual blog, allowing you to see the world through her eyes, I would like to share with you how she is seen. I believe if there were anyone who could give you some insight on this woman… the woman you have decided to follow… it would be me. I am her husband.

     First, may I say, before anything else… she is the real deal.

     I have seen first hand the lows of how hard this disease can bring her and have been there to enjoy the moments in time when she is having a “good day.”

     Being sensitive to a multitude of medications, I have been there on numerous rides to the hospital because her breathing was labored, her throat would not allow her to swallow or her blood pressure would drop incredibly low.

     I have watched her cry in pain while her swollen feet and stiffened legs made it nearly impossible to get through her morning knowing her only comfort would be wrapped up in a cozy comforter while regaining her strength in our bed.

     I could go on rehashing the stories of what you’ve already heard from Terri but instead, I would like to touch on the soul within the body.

     How this woman knows no defeat.

     How this woman gives everything she can, every day. Even on the tough ones.

     How this woman is a true inspiration to anyone who actually takes the time to sit and talk with her and get to know her.

     I’ve truly never met a person who has had life challenge her in so many different ways and who will simply not allow a giving up attitude to happen.

     I think one of the reasons I found her so perfect for me so long ago and still today has to do with my love for the movie “Rocky” and the sequels that followed. Anyone who knows me knows how these movies has affected my life from the time I was a young child.

     Terri has that FIGHT in her. She always has that FIGHT in her. A partial quote from the last movie is, “It’s not about how hard you can hit, it’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. That’s how winning is done.”

     She could have written those lines.

     Through it all, she could have decided to fight the good fight and take a bitter look at the world. She could have looked at life with a why me attitude or I’ll just push on because I have to mentality.

     Not my wife.

     Every day, I hear of some plan or idea to help the environment or a better way to live on this planet. She pours herself into online classes and talks with others who are trying to make a difference in this world. She creates tasks for each upcoming day. All while knowing that that next day may bring a change to the chalk writing on the blackboard in her mind. The next day may erase half of what she has written or even clean the board entirely.

     But she picks up the chalk and writes out a plan or lesson for the very next day.

     Her endless need to be there for her children is an incredible sight to see. No matter how she feels… even with those swollen feet… she will get them ready for school and drive them there in the morning. Help them with all kinds of paperwork even if it means doing it from bed. Teaches them to be good, peaceful and loving beings without an inkling of look at what this world has done to me. It’s always about what can you do in this world.

     I talk with my wife all the time and I know of no one who can give better advice or a good kick in the butt when I need it.

     She is a woman of passion, drive and intellect. But most of all, she is all that is good in the world. A beautiful soul. And believe me, you have found the right blog to follow.

     I’ve read every one too.

Thank you for reading, following and forwarding!!!

Ray

My Interview with the Wonderful +Julie Ryan

I was asked to share my story with Julie Ryan.  Learn more about Julie, her blog and the the interview I did with her.

Interview Link


+Julie Ryan thank you for this wonderful experience!


Thank you for reading, forwarding and following!!!
Terri

Inspiration and Another Healing Song

This isn't just any song!  There's a story attached and it keeps getting more and more significant.  Calling All Angels by Train is a song I connected to during a time I felt stuck in the shadows.  The business I started, a yoga studio, was meant to support myself and my triplets.  At the time I was a single mom and needed to have the flexibility as well as the passion for the business I was operating.  Seasons of Yoga had both.  For two years, it grew and looked as though it would be the piece that was missing, financially in my family.  Then the fibro fog hit.  I wasn't even aware that my brain functioning had dropped.  I wondered why attendance was dropping and began to grasp at anything I could think of to save my business.  I made some poor decisions out of desperation, and I used credit to try to keep the business afloat. My business finances began to suffer and my personal finances began to suffer.  I was in a panic, I felt alone and felt there was no where else to turn.  I began to pray and one day, I heard this song.  Calling All Angels by Train, it helped me through, made me feel less alone and gave me some guidance.  I listened to that song over and over again.  Although, my business went into bankruptcy, my healing music, my family and my faith carried me through.

During the same time period, I was producing and hosting a couple of television shows at the community tv station.  One was a talk show called, Divine Time.  It focused on extraordinary people and their stories.  I wanted my guests to share how they came to be guided to the place they are currently. I wanted to know if they felt they were on their divine path and how did they found it?  Hearing these stories inspired me and my hope was that it also inspired my viewers.  One of my guests was an amazing woman named, Denise DeSimone.  Singing and spirituality were a couple of her passions, before I even met her.  My first introduction to Denise was at my spiritual center.  She was the guest singer and the song she sang was, Calling All Angels. A shiver ran through me and the tears began to flow.  At the time, I didn't know that her story would inspire me at a much deeper level than I ever expected  Telling you her story wouldn't do it justice, so here's a link of Denise telling her own story.

It's probably been about seven years since she was on my show and now I'm faced with an opportunity to heal my body.  Granted, I don't have a life threatening disease, but I still connect with her process, intuition and persistence.  Denise has been very busy since she's been cancer free.  She has written a book about her journey, From Stage IV to Center Stage.  I feel very strongly that her story can help all of us who deal with chronic pain, a change in lifestyle that we have little control over and so much more.

As a bonus to this post, my husband and I are in a position to have to replace one of our cars.  It's not safe and will cost us much more to fix than it's worth.  In the process of looking at all our options, none seemed feasible.  Just when I was at my wits end, Denise posted that she was selling her very safe, 7-seater, good condition car.  Everything about this car fit our needs.  Ray enjoys driving a large, solid car and the triplets are tired of being pickled in the back of my Prius. It didn't seem to meet my needs, as much, because I'm a carbon footprint watcher, save the trees, small living type of person.  Then, during meditation, it hit me.  It's the perfect vehicle for me!  Look at who's energy is in this car.  Look at what the purpose of this vehicle was.  She used it to travel from place to place to tell her extraordinary story of healing and it was packed full of her high energy books with the message of healing.  I can't even imagine the healing energy I can receive just by being in her car.

If you're interested in more information about the incredible Denise Desimone, here is her website http://www.denisedesimone.com/


Thanks for reading, forwarding and following my posts!!!

I Choose to Fly

With chronic illness, many times people are taken away from the things they use to do.  Activities they enjoyed, strived for and were good at.  Fibromyalgia is no different in the way that it has instigated shift in my life.  I'm compelled to look at my life differently now.  I went through a grieving process as I let go of the expectations and dreams I had before chronic illness.  I defined myself as the business owner, the long distance runner who planned to do a marathon, the risk-taker who flew on the trapeze, the spiritual leader and consummate learner.  I was convinced that all of those things were in the past and at one point, I had a shivering vision of being the mom, wife and homemaker who gave up on herself.  A shell of a person with no light in her eyes.

That vision rattled me and sparked the strength within.  I know that my life is not over and I don't have to live the rest of my life as a shell of my former self.  I'm only 45, people are living until 150 these days.  That's a long time to be in the world and unhappy.  NO WAY!  That would also be subjecting my family and friends to nothingness.  I wouldn't have anything to offer, give and share with them; just dead grey eyes.  I'm not done here, in my life and in the world.  I believe everyone has something to offer to benefit society, especially those who have challenges.  We're the ones who find out what we're made of and the choice between giving up or flying smacks us in the face.  I choose to fly!

Now that I've made the choice, I can move forward to explore how I can fly.  There's no wavering here.  I need to try new things, explore a different angle of the old things and listen to my inner voice.  One thing I do know about myself, at this time, is that my confidence fluctuates quite a bit with the challenges of major depression.  Medically, there's a treatment plan in place, but there must be a personal plan also.  I can't afford to waiver, I must stick to my choice to fly with a firm commitment.  As @Tony Robbins would say, "If you're going to take the Island, you must burn the boats.".  There's no turning back.

Looking at the things I assumed I wouldn't be able to do, I realize that with some small adjustments, I can still take part in some or most of them.  I'm able to do coaching sessions and Tarot card readings over the phone and I can schedule them for when they work for me.  There's my business.  It doesn't have to be a large, hustle and bustle business.  I can be an independent contractor making my own schedule and choosing who I work with to make sure I'm not overwhelmed and the quality of service stays in tact.  Running has always been a huge part of my life.  It's something that lifts my mood, keeps me fit, and brings me joy.  The vision of the marathon really wasn't about the marathon, it was about doing what I love to do and that's run.  Letting go of the attachment to what I use to define as running, I can redefine running to fit into my needs.  It's more like a joggle that turns into a walk.  I'm outside and I'm still enjoying the exercise.  As for the spiritual leader, I have a feeling this just comes through me.  Again, shifting my perception of what that use to mean.  I envisioned speaking on stage and sharing The Word and encouraging others to connect with their malkutah, inner kingdom.

It seems as though, I live this and may be a spiritual teacher just by being and living it.  Also, I can learn through books, documentaries, online classes that have no time frame to complete.  The trapeze...I'll let go of that one.  Just thinking about it makes my body hurt, so I guess it wouldn't bring me joy anymore.

As for new options, I'm still exploring.  Writing brings me joy and doesn't feel like a chore.  It seems to be something that my heart just feels it needs to do.  I'm also pretty good at predicting the weather.  My body tells me when a cold front or rain is coming.  When the barometric pressure drops, so does my energy and a weight sits on my shoulders.

It feels as though I have a good start to finding the 'new' things that I can do in this world that bring me joy.  Ultimately, I know it's more about being.  Once we are comfortable being who we are truly meant to be, our gifts naturally emerge with ease and grace.  That's flying.


Thanks for reading, forwarding and following!