Monday, June 17, 2013

Is Fibromyalgia a Catalyst to Something More?

Over the past 10 years, since I was handed a diagnosis of Fibromyalgia, I've been seeking answers.  During my search, doctors and research have made it very clear that it is not a disease, it is a syndrome.

My two favorite definitions of syndrome are from Dictionary.com;

1.  the pattern of symptoms that characterize or indicate a particular social condition.

2.  a predictable, characteristic pattern of behavior, action, etc., that tends to occur under certain circumstances: the retirement syndrome of endless golf and bridge games; the feast-or-famine syndrome of bigbusiness.

Neither one of these definitions indicate that there is any physical connection.  A social condition?  Does that mean that we were brought up in certain conditions that produced Fibromyalgia?  A pattern of behavior, action, etc.  Does that mean that if we change our behavior we can overcome the chronic pain, brain fog and deteriorating quality of life?

I can only speak for myself, but I know for sure that my body experiences severe pain and my brain function comes and goes, like the weather.  It is possible that my childhood trauma may have triggered something within my psyche, but as for patterns of behavior, and actions.  I disagree.  The part about 'social condition' indicates that maybe I choose to be disabled because somehow, socially, I believe that is my place in the world.  Why would  I choose that?  I know that I am health, abundance, creative, mindful, intelligent and here to make a difference.  These are my truths, so why would I accept anything less?  I won't and that is why I continue, after 10 years of moving forward with courage, faith and strength to find some answers.  I am passionate about sharing my process in order to inspire others to keep moving forward with their process.  We all have the answers within and my answer may not be someone else's, so all I can do is share what works or doesn't work for me.

As I look at the diversity of this medical challenge, and how it effects people very differently, I wonder if this is a catalyst to move each of us into finding our own paths.  Some of us experience Chronic Pain that is relieved by Aqua Therapy and that was the opposite of my experience.  Some of us can work full time jobs and some can't.  Some of us have multiple other conditions that we're working on juggling along with the misunderstood fibromyalgia.  Each of us could tell a very different story.  Are we being drawn to work this out as a community, but as individuals?  So far, doctors don't really know what to do with us.  Prescriptions have so many side effects that we either need to choose to not take them or we must take others to counteract the side effects of the original.  In my case, my nervous system is so amplified and overwhelmed by stimulus, that I tend to experience severe side effects.  My body literally can't tolerate most prescriptions.

Along with my nervous system being in high voltage, I have uncovered a gift.  At first I didn't make the connection, until I met a fellow Fibro woman who shares the same gift.  We are extremely intuitive.  I have a knack for seeing future events and patterns leading in a particular direction in people's lives.  I wasn't aware of this until I lost a few friendships after sharing what I thought they already knew about what was ahead for them in their lives.  The confirmations of these 'predictions' came when years later, I got emails or an invitation to have coffee and I was told of their current circumstances.  They shared what I had said to them years prior.  I actually thought everyone's brain could see patterns leading in certain directions.  I use my gifts in this area, now, reading tarot cards and coaching others on their spiritual journey.  This is not my calling, I'm sure of it.  I know that everyone has the ability to be aware of the direction they are moving in and to tune into the answers they seek.  I use my skills as a stepping stone for them to gain the confidence that there are messages and guidance for them, and that they can be open to them on their own. Our society is so conditioned to rely on others to lead them and 'fix' their problems that we've been convinced that we must be dependent on the medical field, or the education system and the monetary system (but don't get me started on that).  

There are times when my intuition is so intense that I struggle to be around someone who is not aware of the path they are taking.  They may not even know that they have a choice on their journey.  

"When you have to make a choice and don't make it, that is in itself a choice."  ~William James  

This, I believe is when Universe makes the decision for you.  It may not be the path of least resistance, but it is a path.  On the other hand;

"Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen."  ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

So, know what your top values are and make your decisions based on your top values and know that the universe is on your side.

I look forward to sharing more of the things I've learned on my path with fibromyalgia.

Thank you for reading, following and forwarding this post!